Comments on Crunchy Chicken: The neurology of spending

I have been battling depression for years and befo...

2009-03-01T15:47:00.000-08:00

I have been battling depression for years and before I identified the issue and began medication, I had a severe shopping problem. I shopped, spent and traveled for the high, racking up $24,000 in credit card debt. It took a while to pay it off, but thank goodness I did...and cut up my credit cards. I still get that twinge of a rush when I buy something, though.

I really am not a big spender, I find a lot of sat...

2009-02-11T12:15:00.000-08:00

I really am not a big spender, I find a lot of satisfaction in seeing how little I can spend at the grocery store, or repurposing something I already have into something new that I needed. But I AM kind of an emotional spender.
Last week, for example, my hubby and I got into an arguement. It was about nothing really, but my pesky pregnancy hormones kind of blew it out of porportion for me. I left the house, practically in tears, determined to see if I could get into the salon to get my hair done... a $60 + expense that I haven't taken care of since October because we just didn't have the cash. Fortunately for me, and the household budget, I couldn't get in.
Usually my insula kicks in anyway, and I go for the emotional high of a $4 coffee or something more reasonable instead. It's still a treat that offers the high in the emotional crisis, but it doesn't break the budget.

lol thats an interesting article! Ever since I had...

2009-02-10T19:28:00.000-08:00

lol thats an interesting article! Ever since I had money to spend I've had really bad problems with shopping. I'd go into a mall to get one thing and walk out of it with $300 worth of stuff I didn't need and didn't have the money to pay it with (I am not suffering from HUGE debt :/) Even when I was already in great debt I still couldn't stop my self from buying things I didn't need because totally my NAcc was way in charge and I'd always get so excited about buying new things and brining those new things home.

But now that I've started educating myself about the environment and the effect that buying stuff and consuming stuff has on the environment its much easier to resist the temptation! (now I just fall pray to temptation of buying plants, worms and other things that help me live greener that I can't technically afford) but luckily I keep those down to a minimum.

I always thought maybe I had no self control but now I can tell myself I just had a chemical imbalance :P j/k

I've never had any interest -- or joy -- in shoppi...

2009-02-10T13:24:00.000-08:00

I've never had any interest -- or joy -- in shopping. And now I know why -- it's brain chemistry.

MEA

sorry about the double post, but I was going to sa...

2009-02-10T13:13:00.000-08:00

sorry about the double post, but I was going to say - I think a lot of people get pleasure from "saving" compared to some imaginary "usual price", that's why sales work so well, but not many of us actually get real pleasure from the nest egg growing.

I was raised to get pleasure from savings - not fr...

2009-02-10T13:11:00.000-08:00

I was raised to get pleasure from savings - not from the act, but from the number going up. I was raised to think of cash in the bank as stability and safety. And it's served me well, saving me from sudden homelessness when I lost a live-in nanny job and later giving me the freedom (like this week!) to choose to work part time. So that's good reinforcement.

The pleasure of saving balances out a lot of the shopping high - it's not good feelings vs. bad feelings but two different kinds of pleasure weighed against each other.

My partner's even worse - it freaks him out to have the number in his savings account go down, even if we just rerouted it into a different account.

I have experienced a "shopping high", but not ofte...

2009-02-10T13:03:00.000-08:00

I have experienced a "shopping high", but not often. Mostly, I find shopping to be an unpleasant chore, particularly when I have two small children in tow. These days if I'm likely to overspend it's online.

I've recently started budgeting and tracking spending more carefully, because I know I can spend less and still live a very comfortable life. I also know that by reducing the 'stuff' I buy I'm helping out the planet. At the moment seeing how much less I spent in a month, or seeing my flush bank account, is giving me a "saving high."

As the child of 2 Depression Babies, I've often wo...

2009-02-10T09:45:00.000-08:00

As the child of 2 Depression Babies, I've often wondered how the desire to buy/not buy gets filtered in our brains. My father loves to spend; my mother was very frugal. Both experienced the difficulties of the Depression though neither family suffered real deprivation. I am more my mother, very frugal. I don't enjoy shopping and don't experience the rush my shopaholic friends do.

Well, that explains a lot. I'm often excited by i...

2009-02-10T08:41:00.000-08:00

Well, that explains a lot. I'm often excited by items I think I want to purchase, but after a few minutes I guess my insula really starts getting worked up because I have to be really pleased with something before I'll buy it. But maybe that's because I'm super cheap.

That is fascinating. Perhaps some people have the ...

2009-02-10T08:19:00.000-08:00

That is fascinating. Perhaps some people have the stronger NAcc and some have the stronger insula. I love to shop, but my insula usually wins, so that it's extremely difficult for me to buy something that isn't the best deal -- almost impossible, in fact -- and if it wasn't a good deal I get serious buyer's remorse and supercritical of myself. I try to keep it in check and be nice to myself by sometimes buying exorbitant things I don't need at all. JUST KIDDING! For instance, even though I would love a luxury car that seats 7, I still have twinges of buyer's remorse 5 years after buying my Subaru ... even though we researched the heck out of the purchase and I was (and am) convinced that this car definitely meets our needs better than any other AND was a good value.

I wonder if it's hereditary. You know how some families are just cheap, and others are wild spendthrifts ... nature or nurture?

I have found it very helpful not to have tv, not t...

2009-02-10T08:07:00.000-08:00

I have found it very helpful not to have tv, not to go to stores. Of course that leaves the ever-present internets.

For my non-food purchases I have a list. It takes a lot for me to buy something not on the list.
Sometimes I see how long I can keep things on the list - things drop off without buying and I don't miss them sometimes.

I can easily talk myself out of buying something t...

2009-02-10T07:38:00.000-08:00

I can easily talk myself out of buying something that isn't useful, which saves me from a lot of buyer's remorse. But there are lots of useful things I can talk myself into. On the other hand I have a problem talking myself *into* big ticket items- I desperately need, really need a new sofa (or at least newer, used would be okay if I could find a decent one) but I can't bring myself to spend on it.

I do get all happy when I buy something I want. R...

2009-02-10T07:23:00.000-08:00

I do get all happy when I buy something I want. Rarely do I have buyer's regret... Ok... with the housing market tanking... I do regret buying my condo. I love my condo. I wouldn't want to live anywhere else but I am basically throwing my money down the toilet.

But I think the reason why I don't have buyer's regret is that I do research what I am buying and make absolutely sure it is what I need/want before I get it. I do a lot of thinking before I buy a big ticket item.

I also don't do a lot of buying so maybe that is why I get such a high? I am not much into shopping and don't window shop. It just makes me want to buy things I really don't need.

I am continually puzzled by my husband who buys things then never uses them although he specifically bought them to fulfill some need. Why? He says he has problems wearing things that look new. Weird... and wasteful in my mind.

It seems that the hardest things to resist are the...

2009-02-10T07:04:00.000-08:00

It seems that the hardest things to resist are the things you've thought about beforehand. Say one day you were thinking that you could use some new bedsheets for some reason. Then you go to the store and see bedsheets reduced price. For me it's hard to resist in that situation, espcially if I have someone with me and I'm in a good mood. "Wow, I was just thinking that I needed bedsheets!", pops into my mind and before I know it they might land in my shopping cart.

Yes, I'm also more tempted to buy something for a family member than for myself. It all comes out the same budget though so I'm working on that.

My best strategies for resisting are:
1) don't leave the house
2) stick to my list
3) walk away and come back if I'm convinced I can't do without
4) treat myself with something very low value

Last week I found I was treating myself with a new type of dried beans at the store! It was hard to walk past all those colorfully packaged foods which I used to buy, but I restricted myself to feeling it was a treat to buy a different very basic food.

Having a per-item limit also helps me - no treats over $1, or something like that.

Back when I was very devout, but still a big shopp...

2009-02-10T06:33:00.000-08:00

Back when I was very devout, but still a big shopper (well, "big" is relative, I've always been frugal too), I prayed to get a stomachache whenever I shouldn't buy something. That worked very well! I still get a stomachache, it's called "gut instinct" I guess, when I need to put the item down and move on. Or sometimes after I buy something, but mostly it does prevent me from shopping too much.

Still, this year I'm compacting, and when I was PMS-y last week, I did go to the thrift store and buy two used books for .69 each just for that little high of buying something. That's sick, isn't it?

Well, my insula must be in rare form. When I'm fac...

2009-02-10T05:26:00.000-08:00

Well, my insula must be in rare form. When I'm faced with a potential purchase, my brain shuts it down tighter than the sphincter on a 2 year old in the midst of potty training. I grew up poor and it must have gathered its strength from that, ha. I almost never, ever, buy anything (other than necessities)the first time around. I go home, I think about it, I see if I really want it, is it the best deal (Thank you internet) and will it really get used. THEN I make the decision. Is this a far more thankless and less-dopamine inspiring process than just buying it? Why yes, sometimes it sucks to be a obsessively compulsive tightwad. On the other hand, we have no debt, other than a mortgage we are close to paying off after only 8 years, and our house is pretty uncluttered, even with 2 kids. It really does pay to listen to your insula, too bad it takes times like these to activate it.

I am wondering whether 'frugality' involves suppre...

2009-02-10T04:13:00.000-08:00

I am wondering whether 'frugality' involves suppressing the good brain chemicals or spurring on the bad ones.

I think it is the latter, because I do get a brief rush sometimes but my thought processes snuff it out before I even look at the price tag.

I think my buy mechanism must be out of order. Tha...

2009-02-10T03:03:00.000-08:00

I think my buy mechanism must be out of order. That and we are flat broke most of the time. The main incentive is to make do round here. I simply couldn't buy new most of the time and get paranoid if I really do have to spend anything on myself. I am much happier spending necessary amounts on the family.

viv in nz

Being a recovering Drug/alcohol addict, I certainl...

2009-02-10T01:35:00.000-08:00

Being a recovering Drug/alcohol addict, I certainly understand the dopamine addiction- In my family we have folks addicted to gambling,food,shopping, booze, drugs, internet porn, and worse of all- Golf. You name it,we overdue it. I can see it in "healthy things" as well- sports, dieting, what have you. As far as myself- I don't get a high from buying things- even big ticket items give me buyers remorse.

it's crazy what you're brain can talk you into thi...

2009-02-10T01:12:00.000-08:00

it's crazy what you're brain can talk you into thinking you need just to get that dopamine bath.. i've made purchases during which i felt deliciously sublime only to get to the car, look at the bag and think "what the holy hell am i gonna do with that??" as a matter of fact, that's how i got my curtain tie backs...that 5 months later i still haven't hung. i've gotten better since i realized that no thing is ever going to make me feel the way i do when i've had a productive day. the feeling may not be as intense but it's certainly longer lasting without the big drop. the last thing i want these days is more roller coaster living.

"Do you experience a "shopping high" when you buy ...

2009-02-10T00:33:00.000-08:00

"Do you experience a "shopping high" when you buy something? Are your purchases ever tinged with buyer's remorse?"
that's the good thing about shopping for the kids. no remorse, because giving your children all you can is considered to be a positive thing. :))
psz